If you want to really be happy, learn to do less.

Lasting change is not the result of some new “to do” on our already too long list. The change we seek is not found in doing more, but surprisingly the secret is found in learning to do less.

If we want to really be happy (and who in their right mind would say they don’t) we need to let go of our compulsion to judge, attack, blame, regret, be right, and most of all our belief that choosing to be unhappy is a necessary even moral obligation. I don’t remember who said it but one of the quotes that resonates in my mind is “there is never a need to suffer, even though we know we must”.

There are experiences in all our lives where suffering feels unavoidable. But in my experience, with regular practice issues that had previously been the sources of inescapable discontent often reveal themselves as merely unexamined assumptions.  Learn to appreciate now just exactly as it is.  Nothing you can do or have ever done can change the present.

If you are not “getting” what you expected,  wanted or even needed, look for the lesson.  Many people believe that everything happens to teach them something.  Where most people miss the point is that the lessons are not about understanding others, but understanding ourselves.