Motivation is Misleading

Motivational experts imply that just the right speech can create a shift in awareness that changes everything.  And they are absolutely right ……for 2% of the people.

The other 98% need time, attention, conversation and community to create sustainable transformation.  The counterproductive effect of this quick fix approach is that the short term sugar high of unrealistic expectations is quickly replaced with a lasting low of knowing that something is missing.

There is something missing but it is not something missing in jobs, coworkers, bosses, spouses or even ourselves. There is something missing in the process.

Change doesn’t happen overnight

None of us became who we are overnight.  We have all invested many, many years developing the habits we have and developing new habits will take time.  Many of us have been mis-led to believe that it takes 21 days to develop a new habit.  Most recent research tells us that once we begin practicing a new behavior it will take an average of 66 days to become habit.  That statistic leaves out the most important steps which are the repeated exposures to new ideas that bring us to the point we want to break old habits.

Before we change our actions we must first change our minds.

The media is fear-full

Nobel laureate Daniel Kahneman determined we have 20,000 “moments” in each day and more than 600 times a day[i] advertisers are trying to make you need something they are selling.

The most powerful way to grab your attention is through our primal emotions.  Envy, jealousy, greed and fear in every form are broadcast not just in our commercials but in the 28 plus hours each week the average person watches TV[ii].

If we allow outside influences to determine our habits we will live our lives in fear.  Fearful people are easy to control; they buy things they don’t need, fawn over people they don’t care about and stress over problems that will never happen.  Changing this unhappy habit begins not with actions but awareness.  Each of the Red Shoe Reminders is designed to make us aware of our personal choices.

When used in a team setting the new awareness becomes part of the culture creating a built in support system for continued growth.

Awareness encourages understanding

The bad news is that there are things that are absolutely beyond our control.  The good news is that all of the uncontrollable people, problems, procedures that really frustrate us account for about 2% of our stress.  The other 98% are things that are absolutely within our power to change.  All we need is the awareness of what can be done and a system to support the process.

We live in a culture that reveres the busiest among us.  A productive manager or employee is the one with a desk piled high, smart phone in one hand the other hand blazing away at the keyboard.  The reality according to science is that multi-taskers take twice as long to complete a task while making 50% more mistakes[iii].  Stress constricts not only our arteries but our opportunities.  Stress is neither natural nor unavoidable.  Stress is, as Einstein would say, “a delusion of consciousness”.  Changing this mystical misunderstanding is a gradual process or binary reprogramming one decision at a time.

Truth drives transformation

Managers gather together behind closed doors developing detailed plans for their next big change and then are shocked when employees don’t just immediately fall in line.  What leaders fail to recognize are the countless little steps they took to trust in the process themselves.  The solution lies in engaging team members throughout the process and not just after action plans are decided upon.  This is not just a telling process but an asking, listening and being vulnerable to criticisms process.  Managers may use the excuse that they don’t want to disrupt or worry employees about decisions that haven’t been made.  The reality is that employees are already imagining the worst and when they are not included in the process they are not only worried they are disrespected.

One of my newest mentors is Vineet Nayar, CEO of HCL Technologies, one of only seven $4.5 billion IT companies worldwide with a growth rate of greater than 25%.  Vineet developed a culture where senior leaders don’t talk at employees, they ask employees to solve their biggest problems and then they listen.  The “Aftercare” system allows us to focus on the issues that are of most importance when and where they “want to” learn.